“We need to talk about the birds and the bees,” a friend said after my post two weeks ago. (Click here to watch the video if you missed it). “The bird,” she continued, “was not trying to get inside your house. He was trying desperately to ward off the bird he saw in your window which he perceived as another male bird. He was protecting his territory and particularly his special lady. What you observed is mating behavior.”
“Well, that makes sense,” I replied, wondering why I couldn’t come up with that explanation on my own.
After our conversation I googled the behavior and found that, “This scenario is surprisingly common and is almost always perpetrated by male Northern Cardinals, American Robins, and Mockingbirds. The concentration of hormones in male birds increases dramatically during breeding season which can cause a ferocious defense of their territory. Certain species seem more prone to being “fooled” by their reflection in windows, thinking it is a rival in their territory” (audubon.org).
After mulling this over, I thought, “How beautiful God’s creation is. What a special relationship He made between a male and a female–even among animals. Just as God ordained, a male is not supposed to share his mate with another and should fiercely fight to protect her, to defend her, and to provide for her.”
Our culture needs to learn a lesson from the birds. Even these animals know that God gave a female companion to a man to be jealously protected. How sad that many men in our society are not angered when another man looks lustfully at his wife, but instead seem to be pleased, actually proud about it.
There was a day when a man would have knocked another man out cold if he had dared look at his wife in a lustful way. There was also a day when a husband would have told his wife and rightfully so, “You’re not wearing that outfit because I’m a man and I know what other men will be thinking.”
Most of the time the word jealous has a negative connotation. However, the Bible describes the Lord as being a jealous God. When He gave the Ten Commandments on Mount Sinai He told the Israelites that He would not tolerate their worship of any other gods. Nothing short of absolute undivided affection for Him would do.
I think a man should be jealous in that way for his wife taking his role as lover, protector and provider very seriously.
One morning I was amused as I noticed a pair of cardinals perched on a branch outside the breakfast window. What captured my attention was when the male kept leaning over and appeared to be kissing the female. However, after a while I realized he was feeding his special lady. It was just the sweetest sight.
I thought, “Now that’s a perfect picture of what Paul was talking about in Ephesians 5:22-33 when he said that husbands are supposed to love and cherish their wives.
Waylon has performed countless weddings, and while the ceremony has changed over the years, he refuses to delete the phrase “to love and to cherish” from the vows.
So what can we learn from the birds about marriage? Plenty. God created males with innate desires and roles which should only be satisfied within the marital relationship. He meant for a man to jealously protect his special lady and provide for her–to love and cherish her like Christ loved the church.
Heavenly Father, when I think about how You created the world and how You intentionally assigned roles to each part, I am overwhelmed at Who You are and Your creative power. It has been so amazing to watch the male bird perform its role as protector and provider for his mate. I pray today for husbands to take their roles seriously and to the best of their ability to love and to cherish their spouses just like You love the church. Help us wives to honor You by loving and respecting our husbands in return. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Scripture Reading: Ephesians 5:22-33
marthabailey.wordpress.com 
I used to have a cardinal who constantly attacked himself on one of my back windows just like yours. It went on for several weeks. His “wife” sat sweetly on the fence watching him. As sweet as it sounds in this story, he drove me crazy because my Yorkshire Terrier would come running out of nowhere and bark at the cardinal. I used to say that the female cardinal was thinking “ummmm…I didn’t marry very well, he’s kinda stupid”. But he was protecting her! Haha
That’s funny, Diane! Now you have a new perspective:)
Another great job Martha. Often in demanding behavior of the male it is forgotten or not realized, that to ignore the very Design you describe, by a female, to a mate, the action (or lack of) is an attack on his masculinity. There are women who consider men a necessary evil to give them children, then they are finished. (Socially they may maintain an image, a historically rationalized reciprocity, i.e. right.) Many pursue the desire to declare their independence and self sufficiency. The Protestant tradition, sadly, does little to even handedly address the teachings you cite. And so I count you and Waylon “a breath of fresh air” on this subject. A wife can have the relationship she desires, just not always only exclusively on her terms and the same is true for a husband. “In the image of God created He him, male and female created He them.”